maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
