So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
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