it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I would ride that face into the sunset
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
