he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
