Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Be still, my beating vagina.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Randomize
