Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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