There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
