i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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