Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Randomize
