She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
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