1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
