I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
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