dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Randomize
