Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Randomize
