Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
