You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Randomize