I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
