I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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