At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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