I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
