If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
