Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
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