Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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