She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
