Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I would fuck him just for his dog
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
