Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
