She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize
