like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
