If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Randomize
