I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize