you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
i need some magic done to my vagina
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
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