may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
