Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize