Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize