So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I have already put on my inside pants.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
