Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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