i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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