Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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