Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
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