halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
