nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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