But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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