I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
