you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
