You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
