I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
