I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
