Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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