never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
