she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Randomize
