haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
