Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
